Five Thoughts on Rocking this Writing Thing In Between Your Actual Life

A lot of people ask me about how I find time in my day to do the things that I do.  It is probably the most common question I get, with the exception of “Are you crazy?”– which for some (undetermined) reason is another question I frequently field.  I answer these questions pretty reliably– first, finding time is really not about “finding” anything.  It’s about corralling, lassoing, tackling the time that so desperately is trying to avoid capture.  And second, yes, I might be crazy.

If you had told me ten years ago what my life would look like today, I probably wouldn’t have believed you. No way, I’d have said, There’s not enough time.  And I wouldn’t have been wrong.  There is not enough time for everything.  But there is time for some of the things.  And that’s the key.  Discover what there is time for, and then go after that with an enthusiasm unknown to mankind.  Because if you don’t, you won’t capture that time– all those small in-between moments that seem so minuscule and inconsequential–but that add up.  They do exist but are so elusive to catch.  So dust off your net.

My commitment to tackling time came about in what most might call an early mid-life (some might say crisis, but I’ll say…) epiphany.  I realized that I was in my thirties and I had surrendered just about all of my in-between time… or so I thought.  I certainly didn’t have anything to show for my in-between time, at least not anything tangible. I wanted something that I could point to and say “Look!  I did something!”  Or, more accurately, “Look how I spent my in-between moments– they are documented!”  I wanted something to show for the minutes, hours, days that had passed besides more laugh lines and heavier bags under my eyes.   And so I decided that I was going to capture those in-between moments and own them.   I started writing with a purpose.

It was about this time when people really started asking me if I was crazy.  And, as I mentioned before, the answer might be yes.  I decided to stop surrendering my in-between time and I made a commitment to using it.  And from the outside, this apparently looks crazy.  But from the inside, it is liberating.  It feels good.  I am getting the bang for my buck out of the time that I do have.  Some might say crazy, I say… productive.  Or, perhaps more appropriately for this post… Rocking this indie thing when it ain’t your full-time gig.

Which leads me to my 5 Thoughts.Five Thoughts on Rocking this Writing Thing In Between Your Actual Life

1. Make promises (and then keep them). I make manageable promises to myself– I will write this chapter, I will read this book for research, or, perhaps– I will run 20 miles this week and clear my head.  Whatever it is, I make a commitment to doing it.  I’m not perfect, but I work toward being better.  Start small.  Build.  Improve.  Part of the fun is watching yourself get better.
2. Box out. The in-between moments are mine and I protect them.  The rest of the day, everyone else has dibs on my time.  But when I am claiming my in-between moments  (even if it’s just 15 or 20 consecutive minutes), I protect them fiercely.  I don’t clean, I don’t cook, I don’t look for the mustard that I TOLD YOU is on the second shelf.  See?  It’s right there on the second shelf! It’s the only yellow thing on that shelf! I don’t mediate arguments over crayons, I don’t answer calls, I don’t care that my socks don’t match (I’m wearing socks? Awesome!).  I don’t address any of these issues during my in-between moments.  So, if you need mustard, wait until I’m back on the clock. It’ll only be a few minutes.
3. Be creative.  It’s ironic that the time that we do have to ourselves is usually when we are at our worst.  We are exhausted (early in the morning before the kids are up, or at the end of the day when they are finally passed out) and don’t have the mental energy to keep even the most manageable of promises.  But– we know this is the case.  So, find ways to utilize the time when you aren’t a zombie.  One example: I use my commute to do research for my writing.  I am physically incapable of reading after 9:00 pm.  I just can’t do it.  So, I audiobook it every day on my way to and from work.  Sometimes I even dictate ideas for my writing or sections of chapters while driving.   It ain’t pretty, but it’s hand-free and it’s pretty creative.
4. Give yourself a break. Keep score, but not every day.  Keep track of your progress, but don’t force progress all the time.  See what your word count is on Sunday.  It might be something depressing like “7”.  Then don’t check it again until the following Sunday.  It might be something less depressing… like “7,007”.  Sure… people who write full time might do that in two hours.  But they are working with full-time moments… you are working with in-between moments.  Give yourself a break.
5. Stay Plugged In. For me, writing is an in-between-moment activity. But what about all of those other moments in the day when I am doing… life?  One of the things that I catch myself doing a lot is thinking so much about what I am going to do when I can finally tackle my spare time that I don’t stay plugged in to real life.  This can be stressful and very unproductive.  If I am diligent about Steps 1-4 (but particularly Step 2), it is much easier to stay plugged in and enjoy the rest of the moments without stressing about fitting in my writing.  After all, this is not my full-time gig.  I want to enjoy the rest of the gig– the kids, the crazy.  If I keep on track with Steps 1-4, Step 5 is a breeze.

And… that just about exhausts my in-between time for today.  Someone is waiting for that mustard.

Until next time, keep scribbling.